That was a favourite phrase of my Dad's, though my brother and I dispute the "again" at the end - it's how I remember it. And I remember so many things - rightly or wrongly - which I can only hope that I remember forever. Memory changes for everyone over time, but sadly it changed to a heart-breaking extent for my Dad with Alzheimer's. I love this image of him in Spring of 2006; even as Alzheimer's was slowly strengthening its hold, he maintained his cheeky self. I had a great relationship with my Dad, so we were close in that sense, yet I didn't really know him that well. (Do children ever
really know their parents?) I was always seeking his approval, much like I think I know well enough that he did with his father; I just happened to be fortunate to have my father around. So, if I didn't measure up, I took it oh-so-seriously...but was the pressure from him or from within? Still, when I met the wonderful person and potter John Colbeck in 2014, I thought, oh, I like him, he reminds me so much of Dad! Our interactions weren't much but just enough,
allora (okay then) imagine my confident eagerness to learn from him as a mentor three years later. But then almost from the start of Piccolpasso 2017, I hit a wall. A nearly insurmountable, emotional wall. It did not fully dawn on me until the end of our eight weeks that John was so much like my Dad, that I fell into (set myself up for?) the same dynamic in the relationship, upon which I didn't fully reflect until today. Of course, I always want to be the best, but really, I just want to do well, to do right by my Dad (and John) for having had the privilege of knowing them. Sorry, guys, I'll do better from now on. Oops
, sorry!
